RUSHING! KILLER SPAM SCAM PORN FLOOD APPROACHING!

Hold on tight, folks, because a massive tsunami of spam is about to explode down on your inbox. We're talking horrendous amounts of fraudulent emails packed with vile porn. These bastards are trying to cheat you out of your hard-earned money, so be super cautious. Don't click on any links in these emails, and flag them immediately. Don't get cau